“I have come full circle papa, in our fight for freedom and our fight for truth”. This was what I thought as I stood on the highway holding my sign up for the truckers in the freedom convoy to see.
I have been so excited since hearing about this convoy travelling from Vancouver to Ottawa to protest the mandates, lockdowns and injections. For reasons I really could not put my finger on, this has been the most important event since my return from Ecuador. Although there was realization, like the many supporting the truckers, that they were fighting on the behalf of everyone worldwide, there was something more not yet able to come to the surface. Not until speaking with my good friend did the lightbulb moment occur clearing the cobwebs. My father died fighting this fight when I was just a child. Everything he stood for, believed in and fought for has been instilled in my soul from the start. Everything lost was because of his passionate fight for all people everywhere. The torture, the abuse, the shattering of my very spirit began at such a young age. The last 4 years the most important as I connected all the fragments.
By manifesting this very act of rebellion and by making signs then going out to support them, I have participated on the other side of the same fight. As a child they used me to find my father, they used me to stop him. Today I participated in the opposite side of that coin……and it felt wonderful. Allowing myself to go the extra mile believing I did indeed manifest this convoy, because I have thought about it every day since my return, then for the first time in my life there is a feeling of belonging, not just to Canada, but the world. It may seem strange to most people because I believe they see themselves as belonging to a “Country”. I do not, so it is the people wherever I am which has the most importance, not the country.
I do not have a strong desire to sing the national anthem, nor carry the flag, these are symbols for people who know who they are and from the beginning of their lives knowing where they were born. Because of my situation, I see only the people, feel their energy and admire them for their strength of conviction in such a situation. Probably because my home country became a symbol of pain and sorrow, my footing has never had solid ground. In honesty I do not know how to describe the complete lack of belonging to any particular country, city or town. I can say where I live, but there is no attachment, never has been while living in Canada. Being more a person of the world, at least in my thinking, based on my fathers influence there is no need in my heart or mind to be from this country.
Despite living here most of my life, it is not my home, never will be. But standing on the road holding my sign, cheering the truckers on, I did feel like I was part of something at last. Is that enough to feel like you are, in this case, a Canadian? No, not for me, this never enters my mind. I am just with the people.
The path of the heart. We are all on this path, different stages, but in the end we are all trying to find “Home” in the big sense. Seeing so many people lining the roads, the line of trucks growing each day, there is such a sense of belonging to what is most important – our connection to each other. While our illustrious leader hides like a coward behind the false pretence of “being exposed” to the virus (which no one believes for a second), I recognize the fear in his eyes. This is a man who never thought he would be hated so completely by so many. Trained to believe (the opposite of me) he was the golden child always loved, this must be devastating for him to face.
I say I recognize the fear, because during my life, there were many around me who had such fear due to the political situation we were in. Knowing I myself, was full of fear for most of my life, I am perhaps finding it easier than some to appreciate how so many were talked into taking the advice of our so called medical professionals. Not just them, but also the media, paid for of course by our government to help spread the lies in such a way as to promote such fear. One must always follow the money for such crimes against humanity. Who has profited from this charade? Why has our PM been allowed to have financial gain from our predicament? Personally I hope he is forced to pay back every cent made off our suffering with compounded interest. He won’t need money where he’s going, if there is true justice. We’ll let him earn his new wage from the small confined space called prison where he should spend the rest of his life. One can only hope he learns a few things, cause he sure never figured it out from the protected space he was born and bred in. Time for the tables to turn as we begin our lives in the age of Aquarius.
How many times frozen with fear, did I choose to allow someone else to decide something important for me? Probably far more than I care to admit unfortunately. As I write this story, I can feel the fear from those who felt painted into a corner because our government chose the path of lies and destruction. How many have cried after taking the shot because they felt trapped by such an impossible decision? I feel the pain of every one of them, knowing as I do how difficult it is to live with what you perceive as your weakest moment.
This is how I felt after arriving back in Canada and learning Señorita Mali had died. She knew the day we parted, actually she knew before then, we would not be able to stay together. She gave up, not because she was a quitter, but because she was very sick and knew I would not be able to stay with her if I was to live. I’m sure there are many who would think me crazy for stating this with such certainty, but that’s because there are those who do not understand the intricate and special relationships which can be had with our pets.
I felt like a coward leaving her behind, knowing she died without me being there. She never abandoned me, true to the end. I felt cornered by my need to make such a choice. So yes I completely understand the many who chose to take this jab, not because they believed in the science or felt they were stepping up to do the right thing for us all. They made the choice so they could continue working, feed their families, keep a roof over their head. This, in the end, needs to be shared with Trudeau in a way and at a time when he cannot fight back from his protected bubble making his empty promises, his false facts and the corrupted science which he has relied on.
Hell for Trudeau would be to have the video continuously playing – the people he forced to make this choice telling their stories on a continuous run. I’m sure it would keep going for many weeks, months even. Can he even imagine, while he comfortably goes on with his life, taking holiday after holiday while we struggle to pay our rent, the burden his actions have incurred, to be carried to the next lives? As he starts to realize it is he who is the “fringe minority”, not the truckers about to land on his doorstep, I’m sure he will feel a bit trapped by his ignorance and greed. One can hope in any case.
Having been a victim of such leaders in my childhood, my understanding as I am finally able to fight back, even if it is through so many others, frees me. It is fitting actually to allow others to carry the fight because as I knew upon my return, this issue had to be fought in this way. It can only be won with love, which is how the truckers are choosing to do. In this country, they carry a much bigger voice than I could ever garner. They represent far more people and they do represent Canada. Therefor, even though I felt at one time, my story could be beneficial as it connects 3 countries, my voice would never carry the weight needed for this fight. To be one of the bystanders affected by a tyranny starting in another country (for me) is a beautiful conclusion really. Being an integral part in the same fight for freedom every country in this world has faced, it is a rather large weight off my shoulders to be the bystander, honestly.
Hasta la victoria siempre!
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