In this chapter we begin the year 1998, which was quite a difficult year in many ways. We faced challenges never expected which would forever change our family, in the end contributing to the fracturing of our lives as a whole.
The Years 1998 & 1999
Being given the gift of the Blue Moon was symbolic of beginning a new cycle. The previous year ended with being awakened and this year begins with such a special treasure.
Despite the unusual events that were beginning to happen to me internally, or perhaps because of them, I began to find confidence in myself. Although it did not permanently last, coming in short, strong bursts, there were just so many things I did not understand which were coming to me in the dream world and I was struggling to find some kind of balance with it.
Coincidently, it was during this time that Ellen and her family came back into our lives. They had bought a cabin on Kootenay lake not far from our home in Creston, B.C. This was a bit complicated because there were a lot of old emotions I had not dealt with satisfactorily in the years past. I had much to be upset about regarding each of the family members I grew up with.
However, needing information about my past I was willing to re-engage in the hopes I would find something of value, yet I wondered at the timing. So I welcomed Ellen into my home, hoping for resolution and reconciliation, but in the end we were never able to bridge the gap between us. Her presence only served to create tension within myself and my children, building a wedge between us. Her skill at separating and dividing took its toll. I could see, especially with Rheann, how the children were becoming more dissatisfied with how we lived and who they were living with. Ellen saw the crack and made the most of the opportunity. Once again I had to say good-bye, this time for good. I would never again open my door to the Phypers.
The year 1999 was actually a fairly quiet year for my dream diary, but it was also a year of difficult change. An unexpected move, saying good-bye to my three oldest children, and a life threatening experience helped to redirect my way of seeing not only myself, but how I had been forced to live with my family. It was the end of one century. As we headed into the new millennium it was obvious that life would take some unusual turns for Lucas, Patrick and myself.
Some interesting dreams, initiated the start of me thinking way out of the box of what I would call conventional living. I began to see there was definitely more to my hidden past than I was able to appreciate at the time.
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