My apartment is huge, truly. It is big enough for a family of 6, I’m sure. There are 4 bedrooms, a huge kitchen dining area (which is my sitting room) and another small room which could be considered a tv room or another bedroom. There are 2 full bathrooms and one bedroom has a toilet and sink. Most people get a bit lost when they try to leave, the hallway is so long, it’s easy to get confused.
When I first moved into this apartment, it was I knew, far more than I needed, especially after living in one room for the past 2 years. But in Ecuador, my living room was the great outdoors, that is where I spent most of my time. Here I am slowly getting used to the idea of spending most of my time indoors, especially during winter. To be frank, it has not been easy to go back to this way of living, but we make the best of every situation do we not?
A few months back, after a friend came to visit and stay the night, I began to feel cramped in my space. Sort of like I had too many things in one area, trying to put all my favorite things in one space. It began to feel cluttered and crowded, so Began the process of migrating to the back room. Actually what might have been the final push, was seeing how much sun came in the back room in the afternoon, which on a cold winter day feels quite luxurious. Then at night, I saw the moon when I went to have my shower, and I wondered why I’d didn’t use this room……..like, at all. So I moved my big basket chair in first. A chair I loved but couldn’t seem to make fit where I really wanted it after moving in, so stopped using it. Then I moved in a table so I could have a book and a drink within reach. Then I decided it would be great to have music too, so in came a newly purchased (from the thrift store for a few dollars) speakers moved in. Then I decided I needed more music selection, and began to wonder if it was possible to retrieve the many albums I had on my old computer. A call was made to a young man who does such things. Big changes for me, especially since I was doing them after losing one job. But then I guess that’s why it happened – more time at home and needing to explore things I had pushed to the back of my mind because I was never home.
Also there was the thought, if I’m going to die because our government won’t allow me to work, I’m going to enjoy my last months on earth in the manner I choose. I faced my situation fearlessly, each choice seeming to bring in an opportunity to not only create my perfect space, but to continue to get enough hours to not fall behind. I really walked around in this cloud of amazement during the last 2 months before Christmas, my biggest lessons and gifts were trust and complete faith. I hold especially my Spirit Guides, but also give much credit to those who went out of their way to ensure I kept going, responsible for where I am today as I write this. This greatest Christmas present ever received by me, which has been the months leading up to the day, is one of Rebirth. I truly look forward to this new year of great change which will happen for us all in many different ways, much of which will take most by surprise.
Because I had so much time off over Christmas, I decided to paint a mural on fabric, the biggest image ever drawn by me start to finish. I say this because I did once do a mural for the friendship centre in Edson, Alberta many years ago. It was not my drawing though, I was repainting the image which had faded badly. So, even though it was a bit overwhelming for me to attempt something out of my comfort zone, I was very proud of my accomplishment.
On Christmas Day, I started this new project, anxious to see if it was something I could manage. I have truly enjoyed the process. As it was so big, it was being done in the large sunny room which I never used to use. Now it was necessary to have a table for the paints, so the kitchen table which was never used for anything put puzzles, got moved in. This began a whole process of making the room more comfortable, chairs for visitors, another small table for the music, lights and etc. After a year and a half, I have grown into my space, not needing to be confined anymore. It seems to be an indication of how I am growing in other ways as particularly, like a lizard, I seem to have outgrown the old skin worn for most of my life. Shedding an old way of living which has been unsuitable for many years now.
There was nothing new bought to fill out the new space, just a redistribution of all I have accumulated since coming back. It truly amazes me how much stuff there is after living so simply in Ecuador. Having so much time at home has given me an invigorated spirit as I determine how I will go forward from here. There are definite plans for the future, each day something accomplished to get me closer to my goal. Learning patience as I deal with the isolation over the past few weeks, has given me much determination to finish what I started in Ecuador. The Hummingbird Project is not dead, it is well on its way, just hiding in the shadows a little longer. I am enjoying piecing together the suggestions from others, from spirit, from my own thoughts, seeing it grow is very wonderful.
Seamos realistas, soñemos lo imposible! And of course…….
Hasta la Victoria siempre!
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